


Ashes to Ashes

by Eternal_Garbage_of_a_Spotless_Mind



Series: Two Pieces of The Whole [3]
Category: Dragon Age (Video Games), Dragon Age - All Media Types, Dragon Age: Inquisition
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Angst, Angst and Tragedy, F/M, Hallucinations, Inquisitor Dies, Lyrium Addiction, Madness, Not Beta Read, Tragedy
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-12-25
Updated: 2015-12-25
Packaged: 2018-05-09 08:45:37
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,000
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5533028
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Eternal_Garbage_of_a_Spotless_Mind/pseuds/Eternal_Garbage_of_a_Spotless_Mind
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>The war is over. They can be together now, do the things they always wanted to do. Together.</p><p>Whatever happens, you <i>will</i> come back.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Ashes to Ashes

Cullen watched her coming down the hill, tossing a thick twig to Pup and seeing the mabari run after it, all but flying through the air in excitement. Trevelyan laughed and ran the fingers through that beautiful copper hair of hers. With the war behind them, she did not see the need to keep it short anymore and let it reach her shoulder blades. Pup brought the stick back and threw it at her feet, Trevelyan stroking its shiny golden fur as she picked up the drool - covered object, making a disgusted noise.

"That beast never sleeps," she complained, resting her arms on his shoulders and staring down at the heavily panting monster that now had its paws on Cullen's knees, its tail wiggling so hard he could feel his legs vibrate."This one is the only child we need. Or have time for."

Building a recluse for the ex-templars had taken time, effort and patience, but it was doing its job marvelously, more and more people coming in every day. Did they ever talk about kids? Cullen could not remember. They might have, once. When there had been time.

_Never enough time._

The bright sunlight bounced off her soft locks. So bright, he could not see her face, just the familiar cheeky smile she had shot his way the very first time they met. She asked him, oh so very coy, about templar celibacy rules. He pinched his nose bridge in annoyance. The headache, it always comes when you least expect it. Pup barked and licked Cullen's face, making the man huff in annoyance and push the animal off his knees.

"You look tired, love. Drink some water and take a nap. I'll get the house ready," in her hand she held a glass, blue colour of liquid making him frown slightly. "For guests. Remember?"

"Guests?" he asked warily, taking a drink and giving her a smile. Trevelyan stood against the sun and, once again, he could not see her face. The drink felt cool in his throat, sending waves of warmth once it reached his stomach.

"Your loud family," she joked, petting his cheek. Cullen tried to catch her palm but she laughed and took it away, their fingers passing an inch away from each others. "It is right here, Mia wrote you a letter. _Again._ "

Cullen grabbed the paper and squinted at it. It seemed he had trouble reading anything at all. The letters were blurry and he could not make sense of it. He rubbed his eyes and sighed, letting the paper drop on the floor where Pup took an interest in it - a black blur of excitement that started to chew the letter the moment it lay its teeth on it.

"Oh and Cassandra," her voice came from the kitchen now, making Cullen snap his head sideways, trying to take a peak inside the house. "Now, go get rest. You need it."

He listened, suddenly feeling tired and drained, as he dragged his feed to the nearest bunk, passing out the moment his head hit the pillow. Cullen was not sure how long he slept. The voices woke him up.

"How is he?"

"The same, Seeker."

"Can I..?"

The door had opened, Trevelyan holding it ajar, while fending off Pup, her head turned towards people further down the hallway. The stray rays of light bounced off their golden curls but the twilight kept the rest hidden in the shadows. He wanted to stand up. But he could not. He would not... The laughter, the chatter. The noise. _Maker, the noise!_

Cassandra entered the small room devoid of any furniture, save the bed. The only decoration on the wall had been a small fresco of Andraste. Cullen sat on his knees dressed in simple dark linens, rocking back and forth with palms over his ears. He had been clutching a piece of charcoal in his fist, smears of ash on his face, blurred by the traces of tears, old and new. When Cassandra looked around she gasped - the white walls were filled with drawings. She never knew that the former Commander of the Inquisition could draw that well. The woman's likeness to the Inquisitor was stunning. Different angles, different emotions but each and every one of them recognizable, even after all these years.

"Cullen." she touched his shoulder slowly, making the man wince and slide away from her touch, dull amber eyes looking right at her but not seeing.

"My... My Inquisitor?"

"Cullen," Cassandra stiffened, he asked that every time she visited and every time the answer had been the same. "She has been dead for more then a decade now."

"That can't be right," his voice changed to that of a capricious child and a second later a smile flashed on his pallid face, hand stroking one of the drawings lovingly, leaving smears behind. "She is right here... _always_ here. She came back... Never left me. _Never._ "

Cassandra stood up. She did not know what to do, what to say. The Chantry sister behind her sensed the Seeker's uncertainty.

"It is better not to say anything, my Lady. Not much we can do but wait for the Maker to call him at his side."

Cassandra looked back at Cullen, the man she called her friend, the stalwart lion that broke the day his Inquisitor sacrificed herself for the greater good. Who, nevertheless, did his duty up to the moment when lyrium had claimed his mind. She called in the sisters the same night, trying to spare him the humiliation of being seen like that - led away by strangers and gagged, so no - one would hear him scream her name over and over again. The same lion who now sat on the floor, his once handsome features gaunt and sickly and staring dully at the image of the one he had loved, had lost but had never failed to forget.

"I pray that time is soon." the Seeker whispered and quietly closed the door behind herself.

**Author's Note:**

> This is a continuation of my previous one - shot, titled 'Forgive Me'. 
> 
> Now I need to retire and eat these depressive thoughts away. Why do I do this to myself??
> 
> Oh yes, because I LOVE IT.

**Works inspired by this one:**

  * [Dust to Dust](https://archiveofourown.org/works/5538968) by [SilentSlayer](https://archiveofourown.org/users/SilentSlayer/pseuds/SilentSlayer)




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